The Cereal Project: Light Up Pen/Stylus

Thinking I'm clever, but you can get these in bulk at 4imprint

School supplies, like rulers, erasers, pens, and pencils, were proven winners as premiums back in the day. One of my favorite cereal box prizes from the 70s was the Sugar Crisp eerily colored glow-in-the-dark pen.

It was an eerie light green that seemed to glow even in full daylight

Gord is a songwriter for whom, given her penchant for writing in secret, a light-up pen is appropriate. And in a nod to modern times, have the tip be a smart stencil/stylus to use on touch tablets.

Why Art Matters: Stevie Wonder, Journey Through The Secret Life of Plants

A blind man making us see

We saw Stevie Wonder in concert last year, a miracle in finding tickets the day of, about eight rows back. He was astonishing in every conceivable way. Doing what I do - obsessing - I read every article I could about him afterwards and was clued into the fact that this album, the soundtrack to the documentary Journey Through The Secret Life of Plants, was considered a huge disappointment by Motown. 

I have to take this criticism in context. It was 1979, and the charts were dominated by disco, hard rock, new wave, punk, and country. Stevie was coming off a decade of dominating the charts and awards shows with R&B funk classics like Superstition and Sir Duke, and albums like Songs in the Key of Life. This album was expected to be another massive hit.

This is none of that. 

This is Wonder as a composer and artist. 

And it's gorgeous. 

Yes, there are hits on this album, Send One Your Love and Black Orchid. But there's also the hypnotic Voyage to India, Come Back as a Flower, Seasons, and the Finale. Honestly, this is one where you drop the needle on track one and listen to the whole thing as a soundscape from start to finish. 

Reading more about the album, the packaging is a stroke of genius. The cover is embossed so you can feel the orchid illustration as well as read the cover in braille. It is scented, igniting another of the senses. I'm now in search of the record, hoping the CD offers the same sensation. 

Reading reviews online, it is clear the fans do not feel the same as the critics, Berry Gordy be damned. Please give it a listen, even if you aren't a Stevie Wonder fan. 

Lipstick on the Mic: The Three Degrees

Funky Divas in the 70s

I once mouthed off that I preferred The Three Degrees over The Supremes. The fact Diana Ross and company were ultimately more successful doesn’t change my opinion. Why?

Fact one: When Will I See You Again

Fact two: Maybe

Fact three: their completely random appearance on the TV show Sanford and Son

Fact four: the theme song to Soul Train, "TSOP (Sound of Philadelphia)"

Fact five: the king of England, Charles III, is their most famous fan

Quick bio: the Philadephia-based group formed in high school in 1963 “because it was fun.” The height of their fame was in the 70s, although they have had random chart appearances throughout the years, most recently in 1998 with their cover of Last Christmas. Sixteen women can claim to be a former member of T3D, and there’s a 2006 documentary of the band. 

Typing Out Loud: Hello, is this thing on?

Back when my hair was brown in my first Facebook profile picture, 2007. 

That was three pairs of skates ago. 

I've been writing this thing since 2008, and I like having a history to go back on to see my evolution as a skater, wife, mom, professional, and writer. But traveling to a skating competition this weekend, a friend commented, "Blog - what is this, 2006?"

Damn girl, way to make me feel old. 

But I'm going to continue to create this personal diary of sorts, even if no one else is reading. I used this to create during the pandemic, working on my Leadership degree, sort my feelings as I returned to high school with Will to see things from a parent perspective, and contemplate all things Beatle 55 years after the band broke up. 

Besides, the dirty little secret to anyone reading that doesn't know, there are features of this site where you can set yourself up to publish entries written far off into the future. Why? It's like writing chapters of a book for me. As for right now, I do have entries scheduled for release well into 2029, the year of my 60th birthday - I'm sure I will have feelings about that!

So I will continue to kick it old school and watch my literary journey unfold.  

October 2025: The Fifth Monkee, Charlie Smalls

"I met a girl, her name was love..."

At the end of season two of the show, the band and producers started a transition in the format toward variety, introducing their audience to new and interesting musicians. This was to steer the show away from being a sitcom for season three; instead, the show was canceled.  

As a musical theatre song-and-dance guy, Davy hit the jackpot with Charlie Smalls and, in their bit, discussed songwriting, rhythm, and soul. 

From Wikipedia: 

A musical prodigy, Smalls attended the Juilliard School at age 11 in 1954, staying until 1961. He wrote the song "From Me to You" for Hugh Masekela's 1966 album Hugh Masekela's Next Album and a song for John Cassavetes's 1968 film Faces called "Never Felt Like This Before."

After graduating from the High School of Performing Arts, Smalls toured as a member of the New York Jazz Repertory Company before beginning work on The Wiz. An African-American urbanized retelling of L. Frank Baum's The Wonderful Wizard of Oz, The Wiz was adapted into a feature film in 1978. Smalls also wrote the score for the 1976 film Drum.

Smalls was a Tony, Grammy, and Drama Desk winner for The Wiz. At the time of his death, he was working on a new musical, Miracles. He died of a burst appendix in 1987. 

Typing Out Loud: That Day

If only it were that clean, I could have handled this...

Two days of typing out loud in a row? I have thoughts, apparently. 

Browsing social media over the weekend, a name popped up as a suggested friend.

And hmmmm, no. While not one of the bullies back in high school, she was one who openly made fun of me on one of the most horrible days of my life. 

As any teenage girl can attest, that would be the day my uterus exploded and ruined - RUINED - a pair of pants. 

Sigh. How to unpack this, 40 years later?

To be honest, I am to blame for not taking care of myself. But I was so young, my period was so inconsistent and... violent. I had no forewarning that it was coming, just a sweaty back and then BAM. And I do mean BAM, I would just be sitting there, and suddenly I was soaking wet. 

I panicked. 

I froze. 

I just didn't know what to do. 

And I had a test in my last class, honors English.

I was leaving gym class, where I had feebly tried to clean myself up on the small square of terry cloth given to us to wash after working out. Useless for what I was up against. 

And what of the sisterhood? 

Ms. Hogle, our tyrannical gym teacher? Proven in the past to be unhelpful, zero empathy.

My girlfriends who were in my class? Dealing with their own shit, an embarrassed shrug.

Other girls in the locker room? No one helped, no one suggested going to Sr. Barb for a clean skirt or pair of pants, or even taking refuge in a counselor's office.  No one offered a sweater to wrap around my waist or even to walk behind me to shield me from the stares, the pointing, the laughter. 

And point and laugh they did - I remember turning to see the two of you pointing and laughing. Seeing my horrified face, your faces contorted to hide your laughter, to only twist in glee at my mortification. 

No girl code to the rescue. 

I pulled my sweater down to hide the crimson stain and hurried to class. Preoccupied with my predicament, I didn't do well on that test - and was called up to the front of class by Mr. K, who asked me to clarify an answer to a question; I felt like EVERYONE was staring at my backside. 

I think I threw the pants away when I got home and showered. I didn't cry that day, but the horror brings heat to my cheeks even now, 40 years later. I still cannot believe my frozen panic.

Typing this out sort of helps me come to terms with the fact that every woman has had that moment when their body betrays them. Lord, it happened to me so often that I had the organ ripped out of me as useless about 10 years ago. 

To make myself feel better by typing out my trauma, what did I learn from this? 

I learned in moments of panic to solve the problem first, and panic later. 

Also have a backup plan, I am rarely without an extra set of clothes tucked away to either work out during the day or change in case of emergency. 

I also came to realize, later, when trying to get pregnant, that my PCOS diagnosis really went all the way back to my teenage years. So much blood... 

I also learned grace and empathy for others. Need a tampon? An exit plan? A jacket to wrap around your waist? You can rely on me. 

And also when not to laugh at others.  

You know what - I do have to mention that while I was alone that day, there was one person who did provide empathy when this inevitably happened again, so shout out and love into the universe for Molli, who had at one time told some boys to shut up, then let me know about the spot on my skirt and slide a pad from her purse. You are the girl I needed back then, and I never forgot your kindness. 

As for the other person: I'm sure you are a great person living a great life and have probably forgotten this incident long ago, and I've forgiven you, but sorry - I can't friend request you, even now. It's not you, it's me. 

Speaking of me, perhaps I need to forgive myself. I've let the very worst feelings from that day define who I was back in high school. It wasn't even a day; it was a couple of hours where I could have handled the situation better had I reached out to a trusted source for help. I learned from it that doesn't make me a loser; not now, not then. I was just a 14-year-old girl having a very bad day. 

Why Art Matters/Typing Out Loud: Farley and the Chippendale Sketch

#TeamFarley

Kind of a cautionary tale of art that harms. 

On one side, the "Chippendales Audition" sketch with Patrick Swayze was physically funny as hell, and for Chris Farley, it was a turning point in his career, as he went from new guy to bona fide SNL star. 

On the other side... the sketch was a cruel joke that didn't quite land, and defined Farley's sketch character development until his death. 

The scenario: after countless auditions, it came down to two dancers to take the final spot on the Chippendales roster. To decide, they performed a dance-off. Swayze was technically perfect, and Farley was surprisingly agile, on top of being funny and sweet. The result? Swayze's character wins the audition, and Farley dances in desperation to prove the judges wrong. 

Bob Odenkirk: I hated it and what it did to his psyche... 

Chris Rock: There's no comic twist; it was just mean. And Chris wanted so desperately to be liked. 

Tom Arnold: Chris called me and said, "Now everyone wants me to be the fat guy." 

Tom Davis: He would slap himself so hard that you could see the mark on his face, and that would get a laugh from those writers, but I would see the mark on his face, and I just saw disaster.

Even Chevy Chase warned him not to go out like John Belushi.   

I agree with all of them. There was a tragedy in his character's rejection. The twist that would have been endearing would have been for Farley to win over the obvious beauhunk, as the judges would have fallen in love with his charm, humor, and the fact that some ladies love a full-figured guy. 

While he was a comic genius, once he started to pratfall for laughs, he threw himself around the SNL set at an alarming rate. His eloquent, gentle giant characters, such as the Incredible Hulk giving a eulogy at Superman's funeral, gave way to more Matt Foley exploding coffee table disasters. 

I dunno, many of his sketches were funny at first, and him breaking David Spade in a scene was always a goal. But the physical comedy that gave him his success also limited his growth as an artist and comedian. Tommy Boy got it right when he was the doofus who saved the day and got the girl. 

I wish Farley had seen himself as the winner and not the fat guy.