In recent years, I have been complimented on being well dressed for any occasion. Baseball games. Dinner out. Skating. Concerts.
How did I develop such style?
Public shame.
It happened several times while living in St. Louis, where we are currently on vacation. Dave, lover of fine dining, would inevitably call me at work on casual Friday, to say “meet me at this fine dining establishment!” when I was wearing leggings and a sweatshirt. The maitre’d would sniff and we’d be shown to a table in a dark corner.
The worst was a birthday celebration at The Melting Pot after a Rams game. I was wearing walking shorts and a polo, Dave more or less in the same. We arrived early for our 5:30 reservation, and was told to come back closer to that time. When we did, we were told we would not be seated because I was dressed too casually, and perhaps I would feel more at home at a BBQ joint.
We ended up at KC Masterpiece, where I did feel more welcome, but the comment stung. We haven’t been to The Melting Pot since.
A few years later, applying for my silver appointment, I asked a judge who I had thought I had a friendly working relationship with if she’d support my promotion. Instead, she told me I dressed as if I were fat, which she thought was sloppy, and she didn’t support me.
Yes, I cried. Later, she felt bad and approached me to apologize for being cruel - while she was wearing a popcorn top! - and said yes, she would support me if I still needed her. I said no thank you.
As a result, I have erred on the side of overdressing. When in doubt, a dress will always do. A sweater instead of a sweatshirt. Flats instead of sneakers. Jackets that look more polished than a windbreaker or coat. Tasteful jewelry. Clothes that fit well and are comfortable on my skin.
Still working on the hair.
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